Working right down by Safeco Field the past couple days has made me realize how lame Mariners fans really are. Between the fact that they do the wave during critical situations, complain about people cheering too loudly, that the biggest roars from the stadium come from the hydroplane races and all the love for Bloomquist, I already knew most M's fans were lame, but watching this series against the Red Sox really cemented my beliefs.
The M's were about to sweep the Boston Red Sox this afternoon. It was about 4:30 and the game was tied in the 8th inning, but people were flooding out of Safeco like the place was on fire. I couldn't believe it. How can you even call yourself a fan? Why even bother going to the game if you're going to leave when it's tied, so you can go sit in rush-hour traffic?
Don't get me wrong, I'm thrilled the M's swept the Sox and have won 5 in a row. They're one of the hottest teams right now and they're only five games out of first and two games back in the Wild Card. It's going to be a fun summer - but it would be better if Mariners fans weren't so pathetic!
Let's do a quick comparison between typical Red Sox fans and typical Mariners fans...
Red Sox fans get decked out for games. Almost every Sox fan wears at least three team-related items to the ballpark. You can tell who they're rooting for because they're all wearing shirts, jerseys, hats, jackets and red socks. Mariners fans, on the other hand, look like they're going to a PTSA meeting. Jeans, a polo shirt tucked in, sandals (with socks) and a North Face fleece? Yep...there's your typical Mariners fan.
Red Sox fans know what they're talking about. They know Kevin Youkilis is a beast and that he's hitting .330/.415/.498. They come to the ballpark to watch baseball and they cheer louder for a single than M's fans cheer for a home run. Mariners fans show up late, drink a few microbrews, eat some $8 strawberries on a stick, talk about their portfolios and their kids' soccer teams and leave in the 8th inning of a tie ballgame.
It just pisses me off that Mariners fans are so boring. If they were more passionate, there would be more pressure on the front office and we'd presumably have a better product on the field. Instead, we're stuck with Raul Ibanez: Mariner For Life. Do you think Red Sox fans would put up with a DH that has a .716 OPS? How about a $13 million 1B hitting .209? Of course they wouldn't - they'd be screaming bloody muder because they wouldn't put up with that crap. But, if you go to Safeco Field, it's obvious that 80% of the people there just don't care. They're there for a fun night out with the family or to impress some clients.It's not a library, folks. You don't have to use your 12" voices at the ballpark. Get rowdy! Show some pride in your team and in this city! Please - the next time you go to Safeco Field, make a point to do something you don't normally do. Buy a jersey and wear it to the ballgame. Cheer for your favorite Mariner - even if the big screen isn't flashing "Make Some Noise!" and your section has the vibe of a funeral parlor. Make a sign. Paint your face. Let's get behind this team, so it doesn't feel like Fenway Park everytime the Red Sox come to town!
That's all just a long rant, when all I really needed to say was that I wish every Mariners fan was a little bit more like
Red.